Recap: So, this is going to be a relatively small update. I didn’t want my first post to be incredibly long, so I had to split up Curtis’ exploration of the town into 2 pieces. There’s not much going on at the moment, as everything mostly consists of just talking to people. Curtis has already explored half the town and is going to check out the rest of Spielburg. Will the rest of the town’s inhabitants be as elderly, rude or unhygenic as the ones Curtis has already encountered? Let’s find out!

Good day and welcome to Spielburg! I am Hilde, daughter of Heinrich Pferdefedern. Do you wish to buy some nice fruits or vegetables?

I think I’m good for right now. So you’re a farm owner?

My father does, yes. We have some land to the north of town. It isn’t very big, but we grow many things. You should be here during harvest time, as we have much more variety.

Variety’s the spice of life. Isn’t it sort of dangerous to be farming outside of the town? I keep hearing all this stuff about monsters and brigands and the such.

Ah, the brigands. Twice they have robbed Father of his money and tried to steal our food we are saving for the winter. Father has tried to fight them off, but they hurt him badly. They would not dare to try that in town. The Sheriff would stop them fast!

You’re talking about Schultz, right?

Yes. Who else would I be speaking of?

Err, well, you said that the Sheriff would put a stop to the brigands.

And?

Well, I thought you may have been referring to someone a little more competent.

I do not understand what you mean.

Nevermind. You seem nice enough and I’d rather not get on your bad side. There aren’t very many nice people in this town.

Are you certain? The people of Spielburg are all very nice. There is a little old lady who listens to everything I have to say. There is also Zara at the Magic Shop, who is very nice. She insists on having nothing but blood oranges delivered to her.

Nice…and a little naive. Well, it was nice chatting with you, Hilde. I think I’m going to go and check out that Dry Goods store now.

You know, I’m really getting sick of the crummy customer service that exists in this town. After dealing with health code violations, rude clerks and now this, the final insult. I can’t take anymore. Honestly, you’re reading a book, a book that you’re soooo engrossed in that you’re not paying an attention to me, a madman who is raving in your store. Since you’re obviously not going anywhere anytime soon, I’m going to go out and do my first heroic deed: support a local business owner who deserves my support!

Yo Hilde, how much are the apples in the barrel?

The apples? You may purchase ten for a single silver piece.

A single silver for 10 apples? You know what, sign me up for fifty apples, because I’m feeling especially heroic today!

Fifty apples? Of course, that will be 5 silver pieces.

Wonderful. Always glad to support local business. Hope that helps the old college fund, Hilde.

Thank you, but what are you planning on doing with fifty apples?

I…uh. That’s a good question.

Surely you could not eat all of them, and it would be a shame to let them go to waste. My father would be heartbroken if he knew that the bounty he has harvested was left to rot.

Yeah…look, I’m really hungry, okay? So hungry, in fact, that I could eat a horse.

I beg your pardon.

What? Oh, balls. No, that’s not what I meant. Look, I’m, uh, just really hungry and there’s nothing I love more than a tasty apple. Now, before I go off to eat my delicious apples, I must step back inside the Dry Goods store. Good day.

Yeah, I sort of gathered, considering this is my second time in your shop.

My, you look like an adventurer. We don’t see too many around here. The brigands tend to get rid of most adventurers before they make it to town. You may be in luck. I carry a modest amount of adventurer’s equipment behind the counter. Would you like to make a purchase?

What do you sell?

I’ve got kitchen kni-err, daggers for 20 silver, flasks for 2 silver each, rations, 5 for 5 silver and chainmail armor for 500 silver.

500 silver? That’s awfully steep. Hmm. I could use a backup weapon, so I’ll take a dagger. Cutco? That’s a brand I’ve never heard of.

Yes, well. The Cutco brand of kitch-daggers are well known for their quality. I’ve got a bunch of them in stock. They make for great gifts. Say, you wouldn’t happen to have any friends or family members who might need a dagger?

To be honest, I wouldn’t exactly trust my friends or family with sharp implements. That’s interesting, though.

Well, I’ve got a bunch of them in stock. And, between you and me? You can make a fortune selling these babies off. I’d be willing to let you buy in and become partners with me, if you’re interested.

Thanks, but I’m not exactly flush with cash at the moment..and your high-pressure sales tactics aren’t exactly making me feel at ease.

You don’t know a deal when you see it! Unless you’d like to buy something else, I think I’ll get back to my book.

Yeah, I noticed you were rather engrossed with that. What exactly is it you’re reading?

Oh this? It’s about an adventurer trying to become a Hero. It’s called ‘A Quest For Glory: A Hero’s Death.’

Hilarious. I think we’re done talking.

You know, if I didn’t know any better, it’s as though this town doesn’t want to be saved. Looks like the only place open here is the tavern and…is there someone in the alleyway? I better go check this out.

Alms for the poor?

Sigh. I was hoping for something a little more dynamic than…this. Still, at least you’re out there trying. Half the shops in this town are shut down and the rest have jerks or scam artists for owners. Here, have a silver.

Thanks. Name’s Sam. You know, it’s really tough trying to make a living in this town ever since the brigands scared all the trade away. This used to be such a nice place to live. My advice to you is not to take up begging. It just doesn’t pay.

Yeah…thanks for the tip. How’d a guy like you end up so destitute? Spielburg seems to be a fairly stable town.

You met Kaspar? At the Dry Goods store?

Yeah, I have. Smarmy little guy.

He roped me into trying to sell kitchen knives and I ended up going into debt. Had to sell everything I owned to Cutco and, well, here I am.

Yikes. That’s harsh. Well, at least Kaspar has learnt his lesson. He’s selling daggers now.

What? No, that’s how he-

Anyway, it was nice chatting with you Sam. I think I’m going to go to the Tavern now and have a brew, after dealing with everyone else in this town, I could really use a drink.

The bar? Oh, man. You’re the first customer I’ve had in over a year. Listen, a word of warning: don’t drink the Dragon’s Breath!

So this is where everyone is. Hey, there’s a piece of paper on the floor.

“B – He’s starting to act suspicious. Better save this drop for emergencies. – B”

Who is B? And who is the other B? Who is this ‘he’ they are talking about? Could it be Vince McMahon?

Hmm. On second thought, probably not. Hey, barkeep!

Whaddya want?

Beer. I’ve been running around this place all day and I really need a drink.

One well-aged house brew, coming up!

So, what can you tell me about this place? I figure a barkeep like you would know a thing or two.

This is a bar. I serve drinks. You want a drink, order one and I’ll get you one. You want answers to stupid questions? Get out.

Why does this sudden negative portrayal of alcohol suddenly make me feel like I’m in a Jim Walls game. Ahem, I take it with that tone you’re friends with Zara?

Never heard of her. You gonna drink your drink? If not, get outta here. We don’t need any ‘adventurer’ types flitting around.

You know, that actually sounds like some great advice. I’ve had it with this little podunk town.

Yeah, whatever, stupid narrator.

Maybe I’ll head back home, see if I can get my old job at the Adventurer’s Mart back.

Everyone’s either rude or entering the early stages of dementia. Let them rot.

The HELL is that? Bah, nevermind, I’m getting out of here.

(Note: I was lucky to have this happen to me, as it seems to be one of a couple of rare events that happen in the game. This screen has significance later on and I think that the set of eyes, the orangish-reddish things in the bush near Curtis, were supposed to be a hint that something is afoot. The only problem is that it doesn’t always happen so you could completely miss it!)

…crap.